Monday, June 12, 2006

Newbie Wisdom

Ruddy allergy! My eye's itchy and so is my nose. Luckily, today was quite grey and rainy (with a little thunder while waiting for the bus), so I've kinda been OK. Bus was late. Or it didn't turn up at all. I don't really know, I wasn't looking at the time... for the simple reason that if I HAD, it would've got soaked and destroyed in the pouring rain.

We've just had a bunch of new Norwegians starting training at work. As I was waiting in the rain after work today, one of them came up to me, as he was taking the bus too. We introduced ourselves and got talking. OK, fair's fair, he did most of the talking, I was mainly listening... but that's what I normally do.

He has a positive view on life and thinks there's more to it than just material things, and that you should be yourself. All that sort of thing. According to "The Celestine Prophecy" by James Redfield, we meet and talk to people for a reason, whatever that reason may be.

I've decided to quit my job. I came back after having had a week off, and I wasn't exactly full of energy and refreshed and with recharged batteries on my first day back. Felt more like I was cattle being led to the slaughter. That's not good. I actually grew really sick of it last summer already, but it was OK, nice pay and nice colleages and some other things. Couldn't really complain too much about it. Then things started going downhill... I won't bore you with the details, but the list of "pros" for working there dwindled, giving way to an increase on the "cons". In the last few months, excrement has really started to hit the fan and it's now a place I detest.

There are so many things to consider, however. I could just hand in my notice and be done with it, but it requires careful consideration. I don't have another job up my sleeve. Can we make it on just one income? Well we could, as that's what we were doing for about 4 months when I moved over, before I got that job. What do I do in the mean time? I could finally get around to do one of those crash courses (no pun intended... honestly) in driving, where you have a month of intensive studying or so and then you get a licence. It would sure increase my chances of getting hired anywhere. That's one thing. I also wanted to go on ACT2 in September, but if I quit my job, I can't really support that financially. OK, I have saved up some money, so technically I suppose I COULD. But wouldn't a driving licence be more pressing? That's £500, and ACT2 is another £500. If I still had my job, it wouldn't be an issue. Also, I've started paying back my student loan now. That's another thing to consider.

So even though I hate my job and want to hand in my four week notice on the 30th, I don't know if I can afford it. As such. But at the same time, working where I am, I feel miserable, and it's threatening to throw me into a depression, and that's no good either. So right now, I'm a bit... I dunno... one thing tells me to get the hell away from there, another one is saying "yeah, but be reasonable, it's money after all!"

So how does this come together with talking to the Norwegian newbie? Think about it. I had decided, but am now having second thoughts. Suddenly my path is crossed by someone who is saying we should be ourselves and enjoy life and be happy. Is it a message from Beyond telling me to stick to my plan and things will work out? That it's time to move on? If we are to believe James Redfield, the answer is yes.

All the upstairs windows are open, as it's very warm. From the open bedroom window, I hear what sounds like an owl. I've heard it once before. It makes me happy. Owls are magnificent animals. Well, they all are (Daisy is kneading the bedsheet at the moment). I really want to go ACT2 you know. It's what I want to do. I have a fricken knack for it! I don't have a proper knack for anything else. Animals and communicating with them... well, it's... what I want to do.

Oh I dunno.

I think I'll sleep on it. Good night!


P.S. Speaking of the ingrown toenail btw - booked in for 9am on Thursday at the docs. Must remember to get him/her to give me a perscription of cetrizin pills as well, as the only stuff you can buy otherwise just contains 7 pills. I need more than that! High tide on the allergy coast here!

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